It's just like the Real World with babies
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize
