when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize