i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
