Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
