i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
