Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
