i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
