Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize