so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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