I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
