So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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