but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
He uses pillows to masturbate.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Randomize
