Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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