I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
We are all done wearing pants today
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
