And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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