sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
