I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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