Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Someone shattered a urinal.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
