so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
