i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
