plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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