Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I cut my penus on the lid.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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