I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
