so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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