Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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