I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
