i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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