Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
What drink are we having for lunch?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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