You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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