i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
