he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
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