I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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