Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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