How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize