:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
