i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
