handjob tips. give me some.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
