Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
