Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
