Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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