i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize