I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
