wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
