Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
