i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Randomize
