did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Randomize
