it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
