She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize