he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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