shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
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