HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
